Ides of March
ArdentTly's take
E-Mail: ardenttly@yahoo.com
AS
THEY WALK THE "STAIRCASE TO HEAVEN"...
X: So...this is the Elysian Fields, huh?
G: Nope...don't think so. Look at all the
neat stuff up here...and most of
it is certainly not Greek.
X: Hmmm...tennis courts, volleyball...say, I
don't know how I know
these things.
G: I guess when you die, you know everything.
X: So I guess we're really dead, huh?
G: Hmmm...
X: So, did you know I just love your eyes?
G: Hehe...um...no. There goes that theory.
X: And that I think you are just the...
Angel: Ahem...none of that up here, ladies. Walk this way..
X: I don't think I can walk that way. Is that a hump he has?
G: Xena!
X: Well...!
Angel: So here we have the swimming pool...
X: Uh-huh.
G: Nice...have any hot tubs?
X: Heh...and soap?
G: <Smack>
Angel: ...and the bowling alley...
X: Hey, that looks familiar. Have any chakrams up here?
Angel: <Ignoring her> ...and the library.
G: Oh, goodie...scrolls!
X: Any blank ones? Or ones that have only a bit of writing on 'em?
Angel: Why?
X: Oh, just making sure.
G: <Smack>
X: Say, what's this wall here?
Angel: Oh, nothing.
X: Spill it, bud.
Angel: Well...
G: C'mon, already...people to see, places to go...yadda yadda. C'mon.
Angel: <Grumpily> Well, it's for the
Romans. They like to think they're
the only ones up here.
X: Julie's up here!? Gods...ya don't say!
G: How come that schmuck is up here? He was responsible...
X: Now, now...don't get overwrought, dear.
G: <Grumble> Well, that really hurt, ya
know. <Flexing hands> I'll be
surprised if I can write with these things.
X: Maybe just...exercise 'em a bit...Toots.
G: <Grin>
Angel: Ahem...actually, Julie...um, Caesar
did make it here because although
he was led astray, he did do some good things...his work with
Cleopatra...saving
Ptolemy...creating the senate...
X: Ah...so, murder of Krassus, attempted
murder of Pompey, Vercinix...and
the creation of government as we know it...taxes, the poor, welfare...
Angel: Heh...um... <Checking his list, checking it twice>
G: Gotcha there.
X: <Smugly> I think I'll have a lil
word with Julie. Be back
later...Toots.
G: I think l hear a hot tub calling my name. <Pinch>
X: Whooo...baby. Forget old ironsides.
Angel: Now, ladies...you're supposed to leave
all the early wants and
desires at the gates.
X: <Leering at G> Another theory blown
away. Don't you have some numbers
to crunch...with the big guy?
Angel: Erm... <Blushing at the antics of his new charges>
Heard in the background: "Angels,
Romans, countrymen...lend me your
ears..."
Angel: Oh-oh...be right back!
X: <Fingers twitching> C'mere, you little vixen.
G: Gotta catch me first...hehehehe!
X: I think I'm gonna like it up here...at
least for a couple of months,
anyway.
---
J: Angels, Romans, countrymen...lend me your ears...
X: Can the heat, Julie. <Wringing hair out after hot tub>
J: Why, if it isn't the Warrior Princess. You're not...cross with me...are you?
X: Nah...right back atcha. Nice grouping, by the way.
J: Mmmmm...yes, the senate did leave their mark.
X: Mark in on it, too?
J: Ha. Ha. No, he was busy with Cleo...the slut.
X: <Smirk> Which one?
J: <Cough> So...just get here? Where's the irritating blonde?
X: Gab...rie...elle...is still bathing.
J: Yes, she was always good at bathing in certain waters.
X: Oh, you are on a roll, huh? So...whatcha up to? Trying to foment the masses again?
J: They don't allow wine up here, Xeeeena.
X: <Smirk> Yet.
J: Oh, planning to do a little changing around here, too?
X: We don't plan on being here that long. <Brushing fingernails on robe>
J: A way out? You've found a way back?
X: Heh...let's just say...we weren't on the stick long enough. 'K?
J: I'd argue the point with you if I hadn't been...under the knife at the time in question.
G: Hey, sweetcheeks. <Sidling up to her lover; pinch>
X: Heh...um, not now (<whispering>) ...snookums...later.
G: Well, we have all the time in the world now.
X: Nah...I don't think we oughta make ourselves a home here, babe.
G: You know something, don't you? It's all a dream sequence. I've fallen for a cult, and they've drugged me, and it's all a dream! Oh, my gods...!!!
X: Take it easy there, bardomine. Besides, I haven't seen any showers.
G: Ohhh. Phew! So...whatzzup?
J: She thinks there's a way outta ...this.
X: <Stroking chin, puckering lips> Maybe...maybe not.
G: You've got that look on your face again, Xe.
X: <Leers at her lover>
J: Yikes! That's just the way you looked in that...um... <Coughs, shaking image of nude Xena outta his haid>
X: <Cocking an eyebrow> Wanna share?
J: Gee...I...um...think I hear my shrink calling...heheh...bubye.
G: Now, whatcha s'pose got into him...?
X: Hehe...well...I DO know what's getting into you. C'mere.
Angel: <Sigh> We may have to send them back before they ruin things up here.